This post is like microwave popcorn. There's nothing of substance here but hopefully, it's tasty enough for you to stick around for another serving. Following the lead of two of my favorite bloggers, here is what is found when I googled the phrase "Evie needs".
Evie needs a skilled gunslinger to escort her to Texas.
(Carrotz, I'm looking at you! Yeehaw!)
Evie needs to stop swearing
(But...Swearing makes you cool! Right? Like smoking?)
Evie needs a 12 step program
Evie needs to drink
(I am feeling so conflicted!)
Evie needs her own sitcom. She is FUNNY!!!
(Damn right she is! Oops, there I go with the swearing again.)
Evie needs to be the only kitty in your home
Evie needs to learn that the can (and the loud noises it produces) can't hurt her
Evie needs to buck her ideas up and actually make something of her life
(I'm trying, but I am just so frightened by the can! Flush flush, all day long!)
Evie needs to stop with the sports metaphors
(I don't know enough about sports to even attempt a metaphor. Craig, can you help me out?)
Evie needs to get her wand and everything
Evie needs her annual well-bird check
Evie needs toiletries for both Women and. Men
(There's something I've been meaning to tell you guys......)
Evie needs to lay down for another nap